Chemical Wedding

Posted: June 22, 2011 in Uncategorized

Post for mikey.

Grouchy.

Out of sorts. Tummy hurts.

O good dog, are YOU in the right place.  Have you READ the last week of posts I’ve made?

What I need is some shit that’s not mine so I could break it and not be pissed at myself tomorrow for breaking my shit.

Do you have neighbors?

Awesome sauce not working – I’d like to hit Sailor Jerry with a shovel.

One of those square, flat ones, not the kind you dig dirt with.

I have extra shovels.  Not only TWO of the traditional spade-shape long-moment-arm zombie-whackers, but one of the square ones you refer to, and IN addition, a wide blade curvy one designed for shoveling coal.  We are ALL about the manual labor here chez zombie.  You pick one and I will direct you at the most likely neighbor to hit with it.

Ans then, after things calm down and the police have been placated, we have awesome sauce cocktails all around. Or just beer, if things have still not settled down.  And a dog that will bark at anything still moving.

Dude.  Milwaukee is really YOUR kind of town.  Except for the winter and all.

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Comments
  1. mikey says:

    Thanks, m’man.

    Actually, I need to revisit this – the Awesome Juice has begun to take effect.

    Giants game on in five minutes. Cheese raviolis in a carbonara sauce for dinner.

    Hey, the game can’t possibly be worse than last night – it was over before the Giants got the second out.

    I was unreasonably happy that I had Falling Skies on DVR…

  2. I tried to watch the debut of Falling Skies, but frankly it didn’t do it for me like Walking Dead did. Go figure, right?

    I may give it another chance, but as an old guy who remembers Spielberg’s last TV appearance (Amazing Stories) I am not sure that he knows how to do episodic work, even as exec.

  3. Oh another post already!?

    You and BBBB sure are making Pinko look lame.

    GOLD lame.
    ~

  4. Oh another post already!?

    Also, refresh.

    I am, apparently, entering a manic phase.

  5. mikey says:

    There was a whole lot that was lame about ‘Falling Skies’.

    The characters are all cartoons, the history professor and the army dood and the whiny kid. Under those sorts of circumstances, the history professor would shut up about history and work on organization and management. The army dood wouldn’t separate ‘fighters’ and ‘civilians’ because they’re basically all there is, and everybody is a fighter, and they are ALL refugees. And the kid would whine about his birthday and how he wanted things to be like they used to exactly ONE fucking time and get a backhand smack and an explanation that things have CHANGED and the goal isn’t sixth grade, it’s not DYING, you selfish little shit.

    And then there’s the guy who used the phrase “leader of a post-apocalyptic gang of outlaws’ ironically. Would it have been better if he had used such a stupid, hackneyed phrase without irony? No. It would have been better if army guy never said jack diddly shit when he got the drop on him that night. Just two through the temple, and walk away. The fucker sacrificed his right to participate, and in that sort of situation, you just kill people like him.

    Then you have people like Hal and Maggie, all of a sudden tossed into a live or die world and bang, just like that they’re deadly pistoleros and awesome small unit combat operators. Yeah. Of course they are.

    But I’m a sucker for this kind of scenario. I’d love a chance to take a group of regular folks and try to turn them into an effective guerrilla unit. Of course, in the real world, we’d die quickly, in large numbers, and hard, but just a few kills, just a shift from ‘oh poor me’ to ‘kill ’em’ in attitude would provide more satisfaction than anything else I’ve done in this stoopid process…

  6. It would have been better if army guy never said jack diddly shit when he got the drop on him that night. Just two through the temple, and walk away. The fucker sacrificed his right to participate, and in that sort of situation, you just kill people like him.

    The only part that made me sit up; when the one woman, left with two of the outlaws to watch the prof, asked if the asshole with the bad leg would live. When the doc said “yes” she turned and plugged him, then the second guy; then she explained that both of them raped her. No apology. No remorse. they sacrificed their right to mercy.

    Given your last paragraph, I think you might like the Walking Dead. It handles the same kinds of issues, but in a more human, messy, less clearly delineated way. In the first season, there was an ep where the protagonists happened upon what seemed a group of outlaws; after everybody stood down, they entered the building to find that they were protecting what was left of an old folks home. People doing awful things, trying to do what is right without any guidebooks.

  7. Also, the opening episode had the main guy, the cop, walking into a car pile up. He heard footsteps, looked under a car, saw small feet in slippers. when he stood up, he could see a young girl from the back, carrying a teddy bear. He called to her, when she turned, she was, of course, a zombizzlet. She groaned and came for him; he pulled his weapon with no hesitation and one through the forehead. Good and shocking, for mainstream TV.

  8. Would it have been better if he had used such a stupid, hackneyed phrase without irony?

    it would, however, have been AWESOME if he had that on his t-shirt.

  9. fish says:

    As Mojo always says: Beer ain’t drinkin.

  10. mikey says:

    Here’s hoping I can avoid self referential horseshit in the grand collapse.

    Just take the lives and build the future.

    And every indoctrinated selfish banker who thinks he’s building a future so he can live in a palace above all natural laws gets gutted and skinned.

    What?

    That’s some fine leather, there…

Go ahead, tell me how I fucked up this time.

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