tonight’s conversation with a Brother of Zombie, ranged from politics and health and employment, as those sorts of conversation will…
Oh, yeah I got the shotgun out.
yea, there are baby raccoons running across the street.
Need to be able to blast those fuckers.
It should be noted that BoZ is elder, and has been unemployed for three years. And doesn’t even enjoy the pleasure of being unemployed with multiple high level degrees, as many goofy shit people like me have. But I digress.
I am ALARMED, yes I am. Fuck, I can barely type. I have several work-type things I should be trying to put out, and cannot make heads-vs-testicles out of it.
Called Other Brother to talk about it; turns out a similar reference to said shotgun came up, during a birthday dinner yesterday.
I AM FUCKING ALARMED.
I called a suicide hotline sort, who were amazingly unhelpful. If you feel like someone is considering offing themselves, you either have to convince them to look for their own help, or wait for the police to be scraping their brains off the dining room window. Beyond that, there is no help at being a family member and helping guide them out of the darkness. Or wait for them to say “I am going to take this shotgun and blow my brains into the dining room; bring a mop”. But beyond that, oh wait you are calling from Milwaukee? the person is in Madison? perhaps you need to to call the Madison Police?
Look, if you are sensible enough to call a suicide helpline, you aren’t really quite there, right? If you have already put the rope around your neck or the shotgun in your mouth, it’s kind of too late, right?
IF I CALL AND TELL YOU THERE IS A PERSON WHO IS UNEMPLOYED AND KIND OF DEPRESSED AND TOLD ME THEY WERE GETTING THE SHOTGUN, IS THERE A FUCKING POSSIBILITY THAT YOU MIGHT HELP ME IN FIGURING OUT A PATH THAT DOES NOT RESULT IN WIPING BRAINS OFF THE CEILING?
Several years ago, we had one of our most favorite nephews, one of the smartest kids ever, who wound up in a negative spiral of crappy jobs and criminal crap. wound up blowing his brains out on the wall of his parent’s house. It was one of the most hurtful things I have ever experienced. It;s the kind of thing that I am hoping we can avoid, ever again.
I believe my older brother is thinking about killing himself, and I do not know if there is something I can do to prevent it.